[Stanford players exit the floor after beating Cal 79-69]

Brook: d00d!

Robin: d00d!

Brook: Whoa!

Robin: That game rocked. We both hit double digits, totally shut down their post game … GOD, it feels good to beat a rival.

Brook: Rock.

Robin: Especially when its another so-called “smart school.”

Brook: I guess.

Robin: I mean – seriously, where do those Berkeley kids get off? Thinkin’ they are the best damn thing in the Pac-10.

Brook: They kept playing. You have to give them that. They kept playing.

Robin: Um, right. But …

Brook: Whoa.

Robin: You OK, man?

[Brook blinks hard to stop the spins.]

Brook: Yeah man, I’m fine.

Robin: Keep it together, bro. Anyway, Berkeley. I mean, they are a fucking PUBLIC SCHOOL. We eat that shit for lunch. We were founded by the goddamn GOVERNOR of California back in the day.

Brook: He founded San Jose State.

Robin: Fuck San Jose State, man. I’m talking about Berkeley. Posers. We have more Supreme Court justices, Rhodes Scholars, and women’s national championships than Berkeley or any of those other nerd schools. What else do you need to prove you are a ballin’ elitist institution?

Brook: Bitches.

Robin: I told you, man – they all do political shit now.

Brook: Narcs. [Brook hates that shit.]

Robin: Right. Anyway – I love shoving those other wannabe schools into place. Remember how awesome it was to crush Harvard and Yale earlier this year?

Brook: Nah, man. I was sitting those out, remember? Something about not turning in work.

Robin: Oh, right. Yeah. Hey, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that … we’re a top ten team now, and you’re supposed to be a leader, so we really need you to …

Brook: Hey, bro, let’s hit the town.

Robin: I don’t think that’s the best idea, man … I was thinking about doing some classwork, playing some 360, or ..

Brook: WE’RE GOING OUT!! WOOOOOT!

Robin: Alright, I guess. But just this once man. Then we’re gonna fucking learn some Western Civ.