Theme music for this morning’s quick post, as we prepare for another ill-advised road trip:

THE STORY EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT
More Schools That Couldn’t Fake Academic Achievement
Buzz around the interwebs continues to center on the APR ratings released yesterday. Rush the Court broke down the numbers in much greater detail than us, with some interesting findings:

1) Davidson had the best overall APR (a perfect 1000) amongst hoops programs, while Carolina had the highest amongst BCS programs. There is a safety school joke in here somewhere, but damned if we can find it.

2) The total list of teams suffering scholarship losses: Kansas State, Purdue, Seton Hall, South Carolina, Tennessee, and New Mexico State take a hit of one scholly apiece, while Southern Cal and UAB will lose two apiece for their historic incompetence.

3) The ACC and the Big East had the highest conference APR averages. If that isn’t evidence of the worthiness of the APR as a measure of academic success, we’re not sure what is. (That, or Big Ten programs are even worse at finding decent educations for their players than we already suspect.)

TWO MORE STORIES THAT INTERESTED US FOR NO GOOD REASON
Speaking of USC …

A little pushy.

Which is the real USC? The school with the awful APR, constant recycling of would-be early entrants, and Tim Floyd as a coach? Or the other one with an awful APR, constant sub-par finishes in-conference, and has spent the last seven years in Odom-induced doldrums? Gosh, if only there was a way to choose - like a leading scorer getting arrested for assault:

The arrest stemmed from an incident last week between Downey and another student he knew [Curtis Lowery], school spokesman Russ McKinney said.

Police were called to the scene, but neither Downey nor [Lowery] wanted to press charges, McKinney said, and there was no incident report written up.

“Then the other individual involved later decided to press charges,” McKinney said, adding there may have been a “very limited confrontation along the lines of pushing.”

In related stories that went unreported, another USC student was arrested for simple theft for cutting in front of Mr. Lowery in the cafeteria line, and a third was booked for simple fraud for telling Mr. Lowery she was disease-free before bare-backed copulation. Lowery had no comment on these arrests, but vigorously denied that he was a “snitch”, insisting that a rhyming word was far more appropriate. (HT: Ren.)

Employment Contracts for Dummies

WfVU is apparently getting better at this whole coach contract thing - Huggy Bear’s new contract extension includes a provision that he can be fired for cause for “substance abuse or habitual intoxication that affects his job”. Huggy Bear will just need to get his kicks in via other means: