Straight ballin’.

THE STORY EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT
DWI Doesn’t Pay Matter

Breaking the law is bad, but if you drink and drive, you will have committed the crime of greatest moral turpitude of all. It’s bad enough that you become a threat to yourself and others, to person and property alike. But brother, it also shows you can’t hold your liquor, and there ain’t nothing less American than a man who can’t hold his sauce.

But feel calmed, citizens – everything you have been taught from a young age is true. When you commit this great breach of conduct and judgment, you will be caught and punished severely by both the public and private. Criminal sanction? Of course. Public shame? Absolutely. Distrust of loved ones? Possibly. Cautious reaction by potential employers? Practically certain.

Unless, of course, you are Ty Lawson, a pure point guard with strong defense, penetration skills, and a love of rollin’ saucy with the music pumping. Then, son, you have a chance to find work in Denver, if FOX’s Jeff Goodman is right:

My guess is that some teams may shy away from the North Carolina sophomore point guard, but I doubt Denver will be one of them.

Remember, the Nuggets, who pick at No. 20, are the team rumored to be extremely interested in Lawson.

The Nuggets have Allen Iverson, Carmelo Anthony, J.R. Smith and Kenyon Martin on their roster.

Not exactly model citizens.

We couldn’t agree more, though we now question what types of “Nuggets” these modern Denver players are searching for … though we suspect a gram-sensitive scale is still appropriate.

Only gold from them thar hills, brah, we promise.

UPDATE: Apparently, Lawson didn’t show up for his scheduled workout with the Nuggs today. Either Lawson is an idiot, or he has a lock stock guarantee from another team that picks before the Nuggets at #20 that he’ll be their pick. A tip of the cap again to Jeff Goodman for his excellent work.

THREE STORIES WORTH A FEW LINES APIECE

Mixed News in Bluegrass – The Louisville Courier-Journal (the only major paper that covers CBB religiously year-round) gives a forgiving account of Earl Clark’s decision to drop out of the draft, but also includes a sad mention of the passing of UK’s longtime equipment manager.

Killing Two Birds One Bird and One Amphibian With One Stone – Gus Gilchrist, who transferred to Maryland from Virginia Tech before ever suiting up for the Hokies, now wants out of the ACC entirely when the conference ruled the intraconference transfer would cost him a year of eligibility. Bad news for Maryland, but it puts Gilchrist on pace to leave school in six years, which is about the par for VPI and Maryland students anyway. (Hardy har har rivals are the sux hardy har.)

Sometimes We Miss Little Details – Like, when it turns out that the new holder of one of the worst coaching jobs in college basketball also happens to be the brother-in-law of the presumptive Democratic nominee for President. Can Obamania bring the Beavers to the top of the Pac-10? Um … no.

We don’t think Obama will adopt this creepy creepy art as his campaign poster in Oregon.